The Emperor Has An Illness

-廖青青(Liào qīngqīng)- Liao Qing Qing, the female lead. 

-廖容华(Liào róng Huà)- Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance, the female lead’s current designation.

-景礼帝(jǐng lǐ ​​dì)- Emperor Jing Li, the male lead.

-福生(fú shēng)- Fu Sheng, the emperor’s chief eunuch. 

-荷香(Hé ​​xiāng)- He Xiang, the female lead’s maidservant

-梨声阁(lí shēng gé)-Lisheng Pavillion, the place where the female lead resides.

–梁贵妃(liáng guìfēi)- Noble Consort Liang

Emperor Jing Li wasn’t able to think of anything else because his head was pounding. He just wanted it to go away, so he opened his mouth and said, “Come and pour a cup of water for me.”

Liao Qing Qing was just about to step forward, but she stopped and pointed out, “Your Majesty, your cup is still full.”

Emperor Jing turned his head to take a look; indeed, he had only just taken a sip. He could only reach for the teacup,[1] raise it, drink it all in one go, and then place it on the table.

Liao Qing Qing immediately went forward to pour water for Emperor Jing Li.

Emperor Jing Li instantly felt an air of physical and mental relief.

When he was about to experience a little more, Liao Qing Qing had already poured the tea and stepped back to her original position. The pain that was gone instantly struck Emperor Jing Li’s head again.

“….” He glanced at Liao Qing Qing. Once again, he picked up the teacup, drank it all in one go and then looked at Liao Qing Qing.

Liao Qing Qing understood that Emperor Jing Li was treating her as a maidservant.

Alright, then. Anyway, this is all she is worth so she will comply.

She went forward again to pour water for Emperor Jing Li.

Emperor Jing Li finished it in one gulp.

Liao Qing Qing poured again.

Emperor Jing Li drank again.

Once again, Liao Qing Qing poured.

Emperor Jing Li drank again.

Fu Sheng, who just returned from washing his face, saw such a scene as soon as he arrived in front of the hall. He was instantly surprised that Emperor Jing Li, who never liked to drink tea, actually finished drinking the tea being poured by Liao Qing Qing, cup after cup.

He did not expect Emperor Jing Li would bestow such importance on Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance to this extent. He made a silent note of this information in his heart; in the future, he must be more meticulous in serving Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance. He carefully asked, “Your Majesty, do you want to dine here now?”

Jing Li finished drinking a cup of tea and nodded, “Mm.”

Fu Sheng hurriedly arranged for the meal to be set.

Emperor Jing Li looked at Liao Qing Qing.

Liao Qing Qing looked down into the teacup.

“You don’t have to pour any more,” Emperor Jing Li said.

“Yes.” If he continues drinking it, I am afraid this emperor would become a water bucket.

She followed Emperor Jing Li and sat at the table. She looked at the table full of dishes with the glazed meat, boiled prawns, steamed pork, assorted sweet cauliflower and so on. All of which she could not eat on a regular basis.

This was probably one of the great benefits of the Emperor’s arrival.

She picked up her chopsticks and was about to pick up a vegetable with her chopsticks. Suddenly, she remembered that the person sitting next to her was the most respected person in the entire kingdom, who could crush her to death with just a lift of his hand.

As a puny Lady of Lovely Countenance, what choice did she have?

Of course, it was to serve Emperor Jing Li pretty much like a disabled. She switched her pair of chopsticks to a pair of serving chopsticks to give Emperor Jing Li some dishes. Only then did Emperor Jing Li lower his head to eat.

The two sat quite close. Emperor Jing Li could smell the faint fragrance from Liao Qing Qing’s body. Therefore, his head did not hurt anymore. His appetite returned and he felt that the food was scrumptious. He silently ate any dish Liao Qing Qing handed to him.

As he ate, he discovered something amiss and raised his eyes to look at Liao Qing Qing. He realised that there were chicken, fish, meat and eggs in Liao Qing Qing’s bowl, while most of the dishes in his bowls were vegetables. His eyes swept the table.

The closest to him was a stewed bok choy.

He looked at Liao Qing Qing again.

Liao Qing Qing buried her head and ate earnestly. It was different from Noble Consort Liang’s self-conscious eating. Liao Qing Qing was like a small hamster. She quietly and slowly finished all of the food in her bowl.

Presently, his head was not hurting and his body was comfortable, so he did not care. He buried his head and ate. Occasionally, he would pick some shredded meat with the chopsticks. This meal was eaten without a peep. After it was over, Emperor Jing Li did not leave and soon discovered a problem.

Yesterday, he slept next to Liao Qing Qing for a night. The next morning, he was in excellent spirits; he did not have a headache for the entire morning. In the afternoon, his headache returned. Once he was near Liao Qing Qing, his headache would be alleviated.

When he got even closer, his headache would disappear.

But it did not last long.

It could only last long if they slept together.

“Your Majesty.” Fu Sheng noticed that Emperor Jing Li finished his meal. He thought that in the past, Noble Consort Liang and the others would use various ways to keep Emperor Jing Li to accompany them to eat and sleep. Emperor Jing Li was reluctant and did not want the ministers to ramble, so he let him make up various reasons to get out of the situation. At this moment, although he felt Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance was different from the others, Emperor Jing Li, who never favoured women, would feel tired after he had already drunk and ate. Hence, he spoke, “Your Majesty, it’s getting late. It’s time for your afternoon nap. In the afternoon, Lord Li will come to report on the repair of the canal.”

“Mm.” Emperor Jing Li nodded his head.

Liao Qing Qing felt ecstatic. Ah, the Emperor is finally leaving. She finally can have a good rest. She missed her bed. She missed her chilled watermelon. She wanted to collapse on the bed and enjoy He Xiang’s manual fanning.

Ah!

Just the thought of it is so beautiful.

“I[2] will have my afternoon nap here,” Emperor Jing Li suddenly said.

Fu Sheng was surprised. This Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance is really different from the others.

Liao Qing Qing: ??? You eat, drink and sleep here. Do you want the imperial concubines to kill me? What are you doing?

Emperor Jing Li said, “Let’s go.”

Liao Qing Qing was baffled.

“Hm?” Emperor Jing Li turned around to look at Liao Qing Qing.

Liao Qing Qing returned to her senses. “What are your orders, Your Majesty?”

“Take an afternoon nap.”

“This imperial concubine[3] is not sleepy.” Actually, she was very sleepy and really wanted to sleep.

“Come with me.”

“???”

She followed Emperor Jing Li into the bedroom. Emperor Jing Li raised his arms.  He Xiang was about to step forward, but Emperor Jing Li ordered, “Leave.”

Liao Qing Qing followed He Xiang and headed out together.

“Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance,” Emperor Jing Li called out.

Liao Qing Qing looked at the Emperor with his arms spread out. She had no choice but to turn back and walk to Emperor Jing Li. She helped him take off his outer clothes, hung them neatly on the screen next to him and said, “Your Majesty, have a good rest.”

After saying this, Liao Qing Qing turned around and made a move to leave. Since I can’t sleep on the cool and nice bed, I could sleep outside on the couch.

“Lady Liao of Lovely Countenance,” Emperor Jing Li called out again.

Liao Qing Qing could not help gnashing her teeth. Is this despicable Emperor crazy? She thought with a smile on her face. Then she turned around and replied gently, “Your Majesty.”

Emperor Jing Li patted the top of the bed.

Liao Qing Qing’s face was filled with puzzlement.

Emperor Jing Li said in a low voice, “Sleep together.”

Sleep your grandfather!

You have such a seductive appearance, but you are impotent. What kind of big-tailed wolf[4] are you pretending to be? She responded, “Your Majesty, this imperial concubine is not sleepy.”

“No, you’re sleepy.”

“This imperial concubine is really not sleepy.”

“I think you are sleepy.”

“???”

[1] 茶碗(cháwǎn)- The literal translation is tea bowl. But for the sake of the flow, this translator and editor decided to go with ‘teacup’. Here is an image for your pleasure.

[2] 朕(zhèn)- I (imperial) or we (imperial use).

[3] 嫔妾(pín qiè)- This imperial concubine. It is a self-appellation that can only be used by Lady of Talents (才人), Noble Lady (贵人), etc to the Emperor and Empress Dowager.

[4] 大尾巴狼(dàyǐbaláng)- “Big-tailed wolf” refers to someone who puts on an act: feigning ignorance, pretending to be solicitous, acting innocent, etc.