Vampire: The Masquerade - Nirvana

Garrett didn't respond to Leona's question, just looked at her with an almost childish curiosity, as if she's a rare exhibition in a museum. "Something on my face?" Feeling a little uncomfortable to eat while being stared at like this, Leona put down the cutlery and asked.

"No. Just surprised at your composure, it is…very unusual. Where does it come from, I wonder, what kind of experience…cultivated it?" He narrowed his eyes, observing her expressions when he came up with the question, "Was it Zack? You two didn't just…'drift' around country, did you?"

"No, we didn't, but I cannot go into the details, so stop poking, and don't force me to tell you with…whatever the magic you used on me."

"For what reason?"

"Safety."

Leona used the strongest tone she only uses in tough business negotiations. Despite her casual dressing, that attitude of dogmatism nearly made her a generalissima—Unbreakable, as Alice put it.

"Very well, I won't from now on." And Garrett showed respect for that, "Back to your question then: I was born in London in 1688, the year of Glorious Revolution, so that makes me…330 years old, factually. Turned by an Italian scholar when I was teaching in University of Bologna at the age of 30, I've been a vampire ever since…or Kindred, that's what we call each other. Most of the time I travelled with my Sire—the Kindred who made me—and continued my pursue of knowledge, visited historical sites that no human could enter and retrieved lost records of history—our side of history…I'm a bookworm, what can I say?"

As he was telling Leona about all this, those jade-green eyes behind his glasses seemed extremely old and experienced for a moment, like an ancient monster lurking under the lake finally rose up, allowing the tourist to take a peek at his true form, terrifying…and also fascinating.

"Do all vampires live like this, archaeologist and…adventurer?" Unable to picture a life like that to be real, Leona suspired in amazement, "It actually sounds…very romantic, like in the fictions."

Upon the word "fiction", Garrett grinned and explained: "It is merely my choice of lifestyle, and having the right to choose a life like mine is a luxury for most. We are a massive and complex species, Leona, not as huge and dominant as yours, but we have an intricate society with our own political and economic systems, and it's even more brutal and dangerous." But the smile disappeared as he dug deeper into the subject, "Most Kindred are just trying to survive…and despite our immortality, the majority of us won't even make it to 100 years old."

These words struck in Leona's heart like daggers, as she remembered all those signs of battle and violence at the night she saw Zack.

"Is it the same for him, too?" She couldn't help asking, feeling a shudder in her spine.

Seeing her fear, Garrett deliberated in hesitation, but after a few thoughts, he decided to tell her anyway: "It is actually worse…if you are worrying what I think you are. You said Zack had radiant, red eyes, yes? That's something only a group of vampires called 'the Sabbats' had, and what they did…" He sighed, "To put it simple, they are the terrorists among us, Fundamentalists going extreme. Most of the young Sabbat foot soldiers are turned unwillingly or unconsciously, and it's highly possible that they don't even know what they've become…"

Leona listened quietly when her head was hanging down, little by little, with sounds of teeth grinding coming out of her closed mouth sometimes.

"Because there's no learning or any training program of sorts, they will be sent to fight and die immediately. And unlike us, they don't have a…'food supply chain'. I don't want to put myself on a moral high ground—we are all beasts, one way or another, but their bloodlines just made them even more…savage, so when they feed…they kill."

Garrett stopped there and leaned forward, put his hand on Leona's tight, trembling fist. His fingers were at room temperature, but that coldness seemed to help her calm down a little bit, as she was losing her grip.

"If Zack's appearance is close to what you remember of him, than he must have become a Sabbat and survived for some years…" He tried to comfort her, "Maybe he's earned something and climbed higher…"

"Enough."

Leona said, one word, light but firm. She stood up, put the dish back into the kitchen—she had lost the appetite anyway. Leaning back on the cupboard, she brooded in silence, and Garrett waited. For quite a while, there were only breathing and clock-ticking in the entire room.

"Can you make me a vampire?" Then, Leona spoke the result of her contemplation.

Raising his eyebrows, Garrett found her question and motive intriguing. He thought for a minute, and asked: "Why?"

She laughed in self-mockery, big and loud, looked not worrying if it would wake her roommate up at all. Turning her back against Garrett, she held her body with two hands on the cabinet, took a long and deep breath to push down the laughter from her throat, and said:

"You know, after his death…I tried to find something to explain it, to justify why after all the sufferings he's been through, God still wouldn't allow anything good in his life. I didn't even believe in God or any…spiritual existence before, but then I have to, because if it weren't for the cruel, mischievous will of some higher being, all this is just…utterly meaningless, and I couldn't accept his life being meaningless. So I became a believer, intimately, and said to myself that since the world is just a burlesque for God's amus.e.m.e.nt, then death is…extrication, and I can move on with this relief, this…motivation, to live with his life on my shoulder. And every time I made a step forward, I feel consolations from the notion of he's watching it from above somewhere, and he's at peace…"

Leona paused, turned back, with tears in her eyes: "For seven years that's how I got on with my life without him, not knowing this is just one big lie...until now."

She closed her eyelids, breathed deep and shakingly again and again, stubbornly making sure that these were the last drops of weakness her lacrimal gland would produce. Seemingly couldn't bear the sight, Garrett approached, wiped away those trails of tears and whispered: "There's nothing wrong at all with trying to live a good life and protect it…and that would also be what he wanted for you."

"But I won't forgive myself, no matter how…reasonable and healthy it is in the views of others, and that guilt will sour whatever I have...forever." Leona looked up to him, smiled bitterly, "And besides, I never really enjoyed this…normal life, did I? Even when my best friend invited me to Christmas dinner I wouldn't go, because deep down…I knew I'll never belong."

So she gathered herself up, asked again: "So…can you do it?"

"If that's what you wish, then yes." And Garrett was convinced, "But we will need some preparations."

Over the following weekend, Leona went to Garrett's office as they agreed, to learn the basic knowledge about the creatures she was going to become, and what she told Alice was she went on dates with her psychiatrist, so her carefree friend didn't suspect anything—even showed great support. Maybe because she knew that soon she would leave this life, or maybe it's just guilt for lying to everyone, she intentionally spent more time with people around her: caught up and chatted about celebrities news with Alice, spent hours sitting on the park bench watching neighbors training their dogs, even went clubbing with the girls she worked with. It was her first experience of genuine night life, really.

"Dr. S.e.xy made her go soft", that's what Alice made of her recent changes, and every time Leona heard her saying this, she felt like almost wanting to regret her choice.

Still, they are just "almosts".

It was not all that gloomy, however—there's excitement in opening eyes to a whole new world you've never known, and it's very interesting to compare what vampires actually are with the legends about them: they do not fear cross, garlic silver and running water, even a stake to the heart will just paralyze them, but sunlight is indeed deadly, and fire can leave wounds that they cannot heal at their supernatural speed.

Amongst the thing Leona learned from Garrett in this limited time, the important one for her, is about an act they call "Embrace", a special ritual that can transform human into vampires—because apparently, people don't get turned just by getting bitten, and it is the only way for them to expand their race, since they cannot reproduce through s.e.x. Through embrace, different bloodlines passed down from Sires to their Childes, forming up 13 different clans, and the name of the clan she would be born into, is "Tremere": the Latin word for "Shiver".

Before long, Garrett took off to make preparations for the Embrace, and Leona packed up a small luggage, told Alice that she would go to LA with her new boyfriend for a weekend trip.

"Send me photos." Those were the last words she heard from her friend.

What she said to Alice was half-truth. Leona was going to Los Angeles, indeed, to meet Garrett over there. As for the reason of this journey, Garrett explained, was to help stage her disappearance—it would be much easier for some unfortunate incidents to happen when people are going to someplace new, for example, like when they are travelling.

And on her flight to West Coast, through the small window of the cabin, Leona witnessed her last sunrise.