This Crazy Rich Boy

"But wait a minute," Claire suddenly says. "How did you know I'm so emotionally upset right now?"

"Well, after what happened yesterday at the pool, I'm quite sure you'd have some lingering post-traumatic emotional kinks."

It dawns on her—Gabriel isn't here because of what just happened with her and Russell. It was just a big coincidence. "Who let you in?"

"Your roommate," he says.

"Karen?"

"Yeah. I think that was her. And the boyfriend."

Claire's anger returns swiftly. "Where are they?"

Gabriel shrugs. "I guess they're still watching TV."

Unbelievable. Like nothing happened. "Come on."

She leads him back to the living room, where they find the couple watching an episode of some reality show.

"Hi Gabriel," Karen greets him cheerfully. Too cheerful for Claire's comfort. "I didn't know you and my good friend Claire here know each other."

Claire couldn't hide her scowl if her life depended on it. Karen's behavior is just too disgusting. "We not only know each other," she says, and in the next moment instantly regrets what comes out of her mouth: "We're engaged."

Karen and Russell stare at them, their mouth open, as though a snake has just struck them. Then Karen laughs. "You're really funny, Claire." To Gabriel: "Claire and I have been very good friends. We know each other's secrets, even the most embarrassing ones."

"Really?" Gabriel says, bemused. "Like, what kind of secrets?"

"Like, well, Claire has never had a boyfriend." Karen flashes Claire the sweetest smile. "But she has a very good sense of humor, so I appreciate the joke about you being engaged." And to prove she really appreciates the joke, Karen actually laughs, Russell along with her.

Claire decides to stifle her anger and just play along. "Yeah, she's right. Karen and I are very good friends." She smiles and gazes at her roommate. "We've lived together long enough for me to know some of her awesome skills and talent. One of her skills, for example, is her ability to reel in wealthy men—sorry, Russell, although it's you who should say sorry to me—and her talent to spend men's money and use them for her own gain. She's so good, it's wonderful to watch her work! Right, Karen, my friend?"

Russell's gaze ping-pongs from Claire's face, then to Karen, then back to Claire. He doesn't seem so sure about what to feel or do. "Honey, what is she saying?"

"She's lying," Karen hisses through her teeth. "She's a big, damn liar!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Claire says in mockery. "I guess it isn't true that every expensive thing Karen is wearing right now was bought for her by you, Russell, right?"

"Well, I did buy the dress, and the shoes, and the…the lingerie she's wearing…"

"And the ring, the earrings, and all the other jewelry?"

"Well, yes, I…" Russell regards his girlfriend as if in a new light.

"And the brand new iPhone, the ŀȧptop, the smart watch?" There's sharp-edged glee in Claire's voice.

"Yeah," Russell says, realizing it all now. "But I did give it all to her. So what's so wrong with that?"

"But didn't she ask you to buy it all for her?"

"I rest my case, your honor," Claire says, grinning slyly as she turns to Gabriel. "But that doesn't get you off the hook, Russell. That doesn't mitigate the fact that you tried to **** me just an hour ago."

Russell blanches. His face turns white as sheet. "I…I didn't mean to…"

"He what?" Gabriel is instantly incensed. "Did you say '****'?"

"Almost," Claire says. "He almost succeeded in doing it."

In a flash, Gabriel's hands are upon Russell's neck. "What did you do to my fiancée?" He slams a fist against the side of Russell's face, sending him sprawling to the floor. Karen screams and throws her arms over her boyfriend, protecting him from Gabriel's ȧssault.

"I know you, Russell," Gabriel mutters. "I can destroy you, your family, your company."

"I didn't mean it, man," Russell stammers, his lip bleeding. "I'm…I'm really, really sorry. It happened all too fast. I liked her and—"

Russell doesn't finish what he's saying as Karen hard-slaps him across the face. "You moron! What did you see in this ordinary woman?" That sends the man comically sprawling again to the floor.

Russell would have answered, "I saw that she's sėxy and vulnerable and desperate," but he has the good sense to shut it.

Is he serious? Claire wonders. Or is this Gabriel Tan the bullshit master hard at work again?

Karen scoffs at that. "You must be seeing things, because I've never seen any of those qualities during all the time we've been roommates."

"Oh, that's so rich coming from you," Gabriel says. "Aren't you two the very best of friends?"

Karen says nothing.

"Anyway, it doesn't matter. Nothing here doesn't matter." Gabriel turns to Claire. "I'm taking you to your new place, my love."

My love. Oh, my God. Why does Gabriel have this tendency to be so cheesy and fake right when you need him to be simply authentic. "My new place?"

"You can't live in this apartment, anymore. Protocol. I need to protect you from—" he throws Karen and Russell a glance—"opportunists."

Shouldn't we talk first about compensation? Shouldn't we discuss the changing terms and conditions of my employment? Isn't this excessively interfering in my life? These and a million questions are dying to come out of Claire's mouth, but she feels there might be a better moment for it. So all she manages to say is, "Okay."

As it turns out, everything she owns can fit in four bags. As they walk out of the apartment—Karen and Russell still on the floor, having their silly argument about who did what to whom—there's the Bentley again waiting for them. Gabriel is driving. As they roll out of the place, he's even extra-cheerful, humming a tune that sounds familiar to Claire.

Gabriel smiles and nods.

It is a thirty-minute drive to her new place. And of course, Claire is expecting maybe a new apartment, a new condo. But no: he brings her to the former Ilustrados Hotel.

"I'm not going to live in a hotel room, Gabriel," she says as they stand facing the hotel's façade. Claire knows Ilustrados is a boutique hotel, catering to business people and celebrities.

"You're not living in a room," Gabriel says. "This entire hotel, this whole building, will be your place of residence."

Claire says nothing at first, then it hits her: she's living in a ten-story luxury hotel. While being employed as Gabriel Tan's personal ȧssistant-slash-fake fiancée. Her throat feels suddenly dry, and the only thing she manages to utter is: "Are you crazy?"