The Emperor Has An Illness

Translated by: Jellylynn

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This novel is to be only hosted on Foxaholic; copies found elsewhere are stolen or worse, plagiarised. 
Names mentioned in this chapter (which can also be found in the glossary):

-廖青青(Liào qīngqīng)- Liao Qing Qing, the female lead. 

-曦嫔(xī pín)-Imperial Concubine Xi, Liao Qing Qing’s current designation

-景礼帝(jǐng lǐ ​​dì)- Emperor Jing Li, the male lead.

-荷香(Hé ​​xiāng)- He Xiang, the female lead’s maidservant

-福生(fú shēng)- Fu Sheng, the emperor’s chief eunuch. 

–李婉仪(lǐ wǎn yí)- Lady Li of Graceful Deportment (mentioned in Chapter 7 part 2 and Chapter 16)

–谢将军(xiè jiāngjūn)- General Xie, refers to Xie Zi Xing. He was the person Liao Qing Qing went on a blind date with. 
Current Ranking: Noble Consort Liang → Worthy Consort + Virtuous Consort → Imperial Concubine Xi →  Lady Li of Graceful Ceremony → Noble Lady Liao + Noble Lady Jiang

A scam![1]

It’s definitely a scam!

" "

Liao Qing Qing was stunned.

There was such a brazen and shameless person like Emperor Jing Li in the world!

She explained, “Your Majesty, this imperial concubine did not bump into you.”

“You didn’t?” Emperor Jing Li asked monotonously.

“No,” Liao Qing Qing responded.

“Then who bumped into me?”[2]

“This imperial concubine[3] doesn’t know. This imperial concubine was more than three feet away from Your Majesty. In any case, this imperial concubine wouldn’t be able to touch Your Majesty, let alone bump into Your Majesty.”

“More than three feet away?” Emperor Jing Li looked as if he had doubts about the distance.

Liao Qing Qing admitted with her head lowered, “Yes.”

“Why did you stay so far away from me?”

“???” What kind of question is this?

“Are you afraid that I will eat you?”

“???” Bizzare. 

At this moment, Emperor Jing Li repeated, “Come here.”

What a temperamental Emperor!

Liao Qing Qing slowly approached Emperor Jing Li.

Emperor Jing Li extended his right hand to Liao Qing Qing.

Liao Qing Qing looked at it. After feeling conflicted for a moment, she slowly put her hand into Emperor Jing Li’s hand according to her previous habits.

The corners of Emperor Jing Li’s mouth quirked imperceptibly.

Then, he continued to put on a straight face.

Liao Qing Qing stared at Emperor Jing Li.

Emperor Jing Li asked, “Why are you looking at me?”

Liao Qing Qing recalled Emperor Jing Li’s sudden departure two days ago and asked tactfully, “Your Majesty, are you still angry?”

Emperor Jing Li puffed out a breath from his nose and said, “You still know that I am angry?”

Liao Qing Qing lowered her head and whispered, “This imperial concubine knows.”

“Then what did you do about it?”

“This imperial concubine went to make amends with Your Majesty.”

“I didn’t see you making amends with me.”

“Halfway there, this imperial concubine turned back.”

“… Why did you turn back?”

“This imperial concubine heard that Your Majesty had reprimanded Lady Li of Graceful Ceremony. So this imperial concubine was scared and came back.” Liao Qing Qing knew that Emperor Jing Li was an extremely smart monarch and she didn’t want to play mind games with the monarch.

Emperor Jing Li snorted and said, “I can’t believe you are so smart.”

“This imperial concubine’s intelligence is not as smart as one ten thousandth of Your Majesty’s.”

“Don’t flatter me.” Emperor Jing Li knew he was smart.

“This imperial concubine is telling the truth.”

“Your truth is that everyone knows about your blind date, except me.” Emperor Jing Li was still bothered about this matter.

Liao Qing Qing hurriedly said, “That’s because it’s insignificant, so Your Majesty doesn’t need to know about it.”

“Insignificant?” Emperor Jing Li slightly raised his eyebrows, appearing extraordinarily good-looking.

Liao Qing Qing nodded and said, “Originally, that’s the case. It’s just an experience in this imperial concubine’s life. Even if this imperial concubine didn’t go on a blind date with General Xie at that time, this imperial concubine will go on a blind date with some other Zhang San, Li Si, or Wang Er and Ma Zi. It’s nothing out of the ordinary. Eventually, this imperial concubine will enter the palace to accompany Your Majesty. That’s the main point.”

So don’t blame the war hero of the country and the people, General Xie!

Emperor Jing Li asked in slight surprise, “Accompanying me is the main point?”

Liao Qing Qing nodded with certainty. “Yes!”

Emperor Jing Li listened and his expression slowly relaxed. The depression and gloom from the past few days suddenly vanished. He tried to restrain himself from laughing and said in a serious manner, “Originally, this is not a big deal. The Great Wei Dynasty has always not constrained women.”

Nonsense!

Just now, he looked like he was wearing a green hat.[4] Now, he is pretending again. However, who asked him to be the Emperor?

Liao Qing Qing only said, “Your Majesty is wise.”

Emperor Jing Li was happy. His entire body was more relaxed. He said, “Let’s have breakfast.”

Liao Qing Qing asked cautiously, “Your Majesty, are you not angry anymore?”

“When have I ever been angry?’

“You just admitted to being angry.”

“Do you need to remind me?” Emperor Jing Li extended his hand and pinched Liao Qing Qing’s finger once.

Liao Qing Qing cried out in pain, “Ah, it hurts.”

Emperor Jing Li immediately let go and lifted Liao Qing Qing’s slender hand. Sure enough, it was red from the pinch. He gently stroked it and looked at Liao Qing Qing somewhat guiltily.

Liao Qing Qing laughed softly and said, “It doesn’t hurt anymore.”

This soft laughter was just like a blooming flower, clear and beautiful. This was what Emperor Jing Li loved to see. He had lived for more than twenty years and never experienced this kind of soothing feeling.

Liao Qing Qing reminded him,“Your Majesty, let’s have our meal.”

Emperor Jing Li returned to his senses.

Liao Qing Qing pulled Emperor Jing Li to sit down.

Emperor Jing Li picked up his chopsticks and gave Liao Qing Qing a piece of mutton.

Liao Qing Qing gave Emperor Jing Li a piece of green vegetable.

The atmosphere was very harmonious.

On the side, Fu Sheng secretly wiped his sweat. Emperor Jing Li is finally not angry anymore. It seems that the anger was caused by Imperial Concubine Xi. Looks like I have to put Imperial Concubine Xi on the pedestal next time.

He Xiang also let out a sigh. She wished from the bottom of her heart that her master and Emperor Jing Li would get along and have a lot of children.

But Liao Qing Qing and Emperor Jing Li didn’t think about these things. They were drenched in sweat after the meal. The weather was exceptionally hot.

Liao Qing Qing said, “It’s going to rain heavily.”

As soon as Liao Qing Qing finished speaking, heavy rain fell from the sky.

Emperor Jing Li lifted his eyes and saw the raindrops falling towards the ground like a hanging screen. Within a few moments, coolness emanated.

Emperor Jing Li was never this happy. He abruptly got up from the stool, walked to the door, looked at the heavy rain outside and was full of smiles.

Liao Qing Qing asked in bewilderment, “Your Majesty, why are you so happy?”

Emperor Jing Li looked at the crackling rain and said, “As the saying goes, ‘Autumn without rain is empty. Everything is never harvested.’. It is good and wonderful that it rained. Presently, the Northern region of the Great Wei Dynasty is in need of rain. With this rain, autumn will be a good harvest year.”

Liao Qing Qing said, “So that’s how it is.”

Emperor Jing Li continued, “Mm. Then during the cold winter, there will be fewer people starving and freezing to death. In the coming year, there will be even less. Until there are no people of the Great Wei Dynasty being hungry and cold.”

As Emperor Jing Li spoke of this, there was a little disappointment in his eyes.

Moreover, it contained much anticipation in it.

This was something Liao Qing Qing had never seen before. An Emperor who cherished the land in which he ruled; ecstatic because of the rain; worrying over his subjects being hungry and cold.

She, who was his subject, felt incomparably warm.

It feels like Emperor Jing Li is two metres tall at this moment!

She could not help but to gaze at Emperor Jing Li.

When Emperor Jing Li turned his head, Liao Qing Qing was still staring at him. He didn’t understand why and asked, “Qing Qing, why are you staring at me?”

Liao Qing Qing said sincerely, “Your Majesty is so handsome.” From the inside to the outside.

Emperor Jing Li suspected that he heard wrongly and asked again, “What?”

Liao Qing Qing boldly said, “This imperial concubine said that you are really handsome, Your Majesty.”

Liao Qing Qing said it in a serious manner. Emperor Jing Li’s heart trembled when he heard it. Not only his body heated up, but his face also warmed up.

It feels as if his face is turning red.

This feeling is too strange.

He reprimanded Liao Qing Qing, “Insolent!”

Liao Qing Qing hurriedly bowed and said, “This imperial concubine had been rude and seeks Your Majesty’s forgiveness!”

Emperor Jing Li wanted to purse his lips, but he couldn’t. The corner of his mouth raised and he squeezed out a word, “I forgive you.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty.”

Liao Qing Qing rose to her feet. Her eyes turned towards Emperor Jing Li.

Hm?

Why did Emperor Jing Li turn his handsome face to the other side?

[1] 碰瓷(pèngcí)-Staged act/to scam somebody by setting up an “accident” in which one appears to have sustained damage or injury caused by the scam victim, then demanding compensation. The variation of these incidents include putting “expensive” porcelain in a place where it is likely to be knocked over by passers-by, and stepping into the path of a slow-moving car. Thus, it sort of relates to its literal translation of the words ‘touching or bumping(碰) porcelain(瓷)’.

[2] 朕(zhèn)- I (imperial) or we (imperial use).

[3] 嫔妾(pín qiè)- This imperial concubine. It is a self-appellation that can only be used by Lady of Talents (才人), Noble Lady (贵人), etc to the Emperor and Empress Dowager.

[4] 绿帽子(lǜmàozi)-Green hat. It is a slang word that means to cheat on one’s spouse or boyfriend or girlfriend.