In The Depths Of Shame, Love Exists

Chapter 25

Once the words started to come out, she couldn’t stop them any longer.

“I love you. I’ve been thinking, thinking, and thinking of you for so long.”

If I don’t say it now, then I may never have the chance.

“I love you, I love you. My Dane…… I love you.”

If it was going to end like this, I should have shown it all on the day I first realized my love for you.

I wouldn’t express my love in just this way. I’ll whisper my love in your ear every day, and show you my everything while being in your arms every day. The time that had passed was so heartless.

“I’ve loved you for a very long time. How can I not love you?”

Dane urgently sought Liv’s lips.

A soft tongue slipped between Liv’s lips and ran wildly inside. A strong force pushed Liv backwards, her back touching the carriage. Their tongues intertwined frantically, and they breathed in each other’s sweet breath.

Dane pulled his lips away and looked down at Liv. There was an indescribable exaltation in his eyes.

He scanned Liv’s face with trembling eyes, and gently brushed Liv’s chin again. Liv opened her mouth and gladly invited him.

The two did not separate until all the carriages were gone. Dane said, pulling his lips away with difficulty.

“Get inside the carriage. Only if you move can I get out of here.”

This moment was regrettable for Liv as well. Liv ran her eyes and hands over his face. Dark eyebrows and a high nose bridge, soft skin, plump lips and, finally, eyes resembling a lake.

Dane gently closed his eyes and entrusted his face to her.

‘I will never forget this face.’

Stroking his face, Liv kissed Dane one last time. Her soft lips softly settled on his.

“Dane, don’t get hurt.”

***

A carriage passed through the road at a noticeably slow pace. The carriage trailing behind it couldn’t stand it and sped ahead. Only the slow carriage remained in the narrow street, rattling and moving very slowly.

The coachman, who was pulling the horses in a black robe, soon stopped the carriage, got off his seat, and opened the carriage door. Liv looked at the coachman nervously.

“There’s a boat waiting for us on the border of Hale and Lesbourne. We have to ride that to leave this place.”

The coachman was Lohan. He took off the robe he was wearing and handed it to Liv as he got out of the carriage.

“We don’t have time to change your clothes, so cover it with this.”

The dress was covered with a robe and had lost its color. Lohan, who had a stiff face all along, asked Liv.

“Do you really want to go?”

“…… I know what you’re thinking. I am not reliable. I don’t know how to do anything. I’m stupid.”

“It’s not like that.”

Lohan sighed.

“I joined the rebels, determined to do everything. But, you’re different. If something happens to you, I…… I’m not sure if I can bear it…… I’m afraid something will happen to you.”

With just the two of them, Lohan revealed his soft heart. Just as Lohan was the only family left for Liv, Lohan had only Liv left. He wanted Liv’s safety more than anyone else.

From his face that was about to cry remained the young Lohan whom Liv remembered. When Lohan cried, she would soothe him by stroking the nape of his neck. Lohan, who was taller than her, lowered his head as Liv touched the nape of his neck.

“I’m sorry.”

At Liv’s answer, Lohan let out a long sigh. Liv never seemed to want to change her mind.

Lohan pulled Liv’s hand away from the nape of his neck and turned back. He needed time to accept it.

Moments later, Lohan made up his mind and wiped his face roughly. Then he untied the horse from the carriage and dragged it in front of Liv. As Liv got on the horse, he sat behind her and grabbed the reins.

“Hale will already be guarded by soldiers, so we have to go to the port through Lesbourne. Hold on tight.”

On the border of Hale and Lesbourne was a port that had long since been abandoned. From there, they had to escape by boat.

Liv held onto the running horse tightly to keep the robe from slipping off. But it wasn’t long before they had to stop the horse. The road to Lesbourne was already encamped and guarded by soldiers.

‘I shouldn’t have wasted that much time in front of the carriage!’

Lohan looked around. There was no escape route in sight. There was no way left. He turned the horse around without hesitation.

“You’re thinking of going to Hale, right? Go this way. No one knows this place. If we go through the grass thicket, we’ll find a temple.”

Lohan drove the horse into the grass thicket that Liv was pointing at. The twigs touched their bodies. Liv wore the hat attached to the robe to protect her face. A branch sticking out scraped Lohan’s face, creating a scratch.

As Liv said, after passing through the grass thicket, a temple was seen. The beautiful temple was filled with acrid smoke, making it difficult to see ahead.

‘Ms. Deborah must have easily escaped.’

Lohan glanced back and looked at the temple.

Their plan was to start a fire and cause chaos, take Liv away, and then, at the appropriate time, Deborah would hide in the smoke and escape. It was a sloppy and hastily issued measure after discovering that there were snipers on top of the temple.

The weather, which had not been windy, slowly began to change. With this much wind, the smoke may be lifted away in an instant, revealing their presence. They had to get out of range of the sniper as quickly as possible.

Lohan swung the reins to make the horse run faster.

“Keuk!”

“Lohan!”

At that moment, a bullet flew from behind and pierced Lohan’s right forearm. In an instant, his right arm lost its strength and missed the reins. Soon after, another shot flew and grazed his left shoulder. Lohan lost his balance and his body tilted.

‘They’ve already found us!’

If they stop here, they might get caught. Lohan clenched his teeth and grabbed the reins properly again.

Lohan’s trembling arm caught Liv’s eye. His clothes were already soaked in blood. This was too hard.

Being a rebel always meant facing this situation. Liv now knew what choice she had made. The terror and fear of not knowing when to die might be more painful than her frustration and inferiority.

However, Liv had already made the choice and had to take responsibility for it. Nothing could have been changed if she would only be protected in Lohan’s arms.

Liv decided to take a risky gamble.

“Lohan, stop the horse.”

“What?”

“Stop the horse, Lohan! If you carry on like this, you will die!”

“If I stop the horse here, we’ll both die!”

“No, we won’t die! So trust me and stop the horse!”

Liv grabbed the reins and pulled it back, and the horse turned around. Thanks to this, the bullet narrowly missed the side of the horse’s torso.

Lohan had no choice but to stop the horse. Liv hurriedly threw off her robe and came down to the ground. A dazzling white dress appeared.

“Liv! What are you doing!”

Before Lohan could say anything else, Liv climbed behind him. The reins naturally fell into Liv’s hands. Liv drove the horse with her dress fluttering.

Liv’s slender body was not enough to hide Lohan.

“It’s very hard, isn’t it? I’m sorry. If I had been strong, I would have supported you steadily.”

“Is that something to say in this situation? You might get shot! And if they find out who you are!”

“It’s fine.”

“What do you mean it’s fine? If this was all you thought, I would have never stopped the horse!”

Lohan shouted in a dither.

“You won’t hear any more gunshots.”

“What nonsense is that! Even this distance is not enough.”

Lohan finally realized that no bullets were coming now.

“What are those bastards up to now?”

Lohan struggled to turn his head to see what had happened and looked at the temple over Liv’s shoulder. However, the temple was already too far away to grasp the situation with the naked eye.

As Lohan was about to look forward again with an uncomfortable face, he found Liv biting her lip and holding back her tears.

“Liv? Could it be that you got shot?”

“No, it’s just…… just…….”

‘The bullets are really not flying now.’

Liv closed her lips tightly and didn’t speak.

Lohan, who was looking at Liv with shaking eyes, opened his mouth to ask something, then turned his head to look ahead. He didn’t want to know or ask anymore.

He erased from his mind the expression on Liv’s face that he had just seen, as well as the desperate confession of love he had heard from the coachman’s seat. He didn’t know what had happened between the two, but everything had already ended.

A fierce wind swept Liv’s eyes and blew the tears away. Liv entrusted her body to the wind.

‘Who would believe me if I said I had never ridden a horse through such a beautiful wilderness in my life in Hale?’

Liv looked at the sea in front of her and felt true freedom. The smell of the sea and sunlight that she always smelled was unfamiliar.

So this was what freedom was. She shivered with excitement and burst into tears at the same time. This was true freedom.

But there can be no perfect happiness. In exchange for gaining freedom, she lost her love.

‘No, I didn’t.’

Liv shook her head. Her love was eternal.

Liv did not lose her love, she was leaving for love. Being by Dane’s side may encroach on an ugly love and drag him to the bottom.

‘I hope Dane will eventually be unhappy, and live off of me.’

Liv had already tasted the dirty truth in herself.

She did not want to ruin Dane. She just didn’t want to be tied down by guilt or responsibility.

She remembered the brief moment when she was married to him.

‘This is enough for me…….’

Liv laughed bitterly.

On the blue sea, a woman runs towards the blazing sun. Bathed in the light of the sun, the woman throws off her transgressions and is finally born again.

‘May Dane forget everything about this place, and return safely to his country.’

Love and freedom, freedom and love.

It was a painful happiness.