I Don't Trust My Twin Sister

“Brother, are you dying?”

“No, why am I dying? Don’t worry, I’m always by your side, Boria.”

Biting his lip at the sight of his stroking his brother’s head, he turned his head away. He jumped up from his seat to avoid the uncomfortable sight for no reason. His eyes were on me, but he kept his eyes out and opened his mouth.

“…I’ll go. Benson wants his brother to come with him to the castle once things are sorted out. It would be nice if you could come by tomorrow.”

“I’ll do that.”

Benson clicked his tongue low as he walked out the door, not taking his eyes off his brother. Soon I was surrounded by knights escorting me. Unpleasantness was weighing down my body. Others smiled at the warmth of the two, but were somehow dissatisfied. He lifted his waist slightly to check his brother’s figure again, then frowned.

‘It’s annoying…’

I felt like a bad kid somehow.

* * *

After going out and returning to my room, Ersia entered my field of vision. It was as if she was saying that I was not very good today. As soon as my eyes met Ersia’s, I turned my head away with a frown on my face. I averted my gaze to pretend not to see, but my twin sister opened her mouth behind me.

“Sister.”

Haa, the damn sister who didn’t notice and didn’t know the atmosphere. In my mind, I wanted to shake her off immediately, but I had eyes around me and I was forced to lift my body with a fake smile.

“What?”

“Where are you going?”

For what purpose was she asking? Was she really asking me out of curiosity about the place, or was she asking where I kept wandering around? Was she asking if I’m having a good day? Somehow, useless thoughts continued to distract me, so I couldn’t open my mouth easily and just stared at her.

Ersia’s face, whose expression strangely changed, resembled mine, causing discomfort. Anyway, I was afraid that my appearance would look bad to others.

“Sister, what’s wrong? Your face looks really bad.”

With her pretentious expression, I gently grabbed Ercia’s hand as she reached out to touch my forehead and shook her head. Then, looking at Ersia, who was making a puzzled expression on her face, I opened my mouth.

“It’s because I’m tired from doing some important work for a while. Are you okay today? Aren’t you sick?”

Did she have any pain? Ersia’s disease was almost completely cured by this time.

“It’s a bit dizzy, but it feels like I’m only in my room. I came here to get some fresh air and change my mood, but my sister doesn’t look too good… don’t you?”

Uh, right, it’s because of her. I forced a smile. I thought it was easy to put on the mask, but I couldn’t easily put it on my face because the mask was as heavy as a thousand pounds. Ah, Ersia, my sister, my twin sister who resembles me, my desperate half who used to be the object of love and hatred, but now only the middle arrogance remains. I could feel myself breaking down with her alone. If she exhaled, I felt like I would be cured of complaints and complaints at any moment. Because of her, I have changed like this. I couldn’t afford to congratulate the pure joy of the siblings who had freed themselves from long-term restraints and found freedom. They both looked like lies. I thought maybe that younger brother could have taken advantage of his older brother. And seeing me in the person of that older brother, it was like seeing the me of the past, standing tall and enduring the harsh waves to protect you. Did she know the feeling of standing on a cliff with no one to support you? Did she know how it feels to be betrayed by you and smile again in this place? I was standing in the past because of something that couldn’t be explained, but I was not the old me. Sister, the broken Lawrence was already just an actress who was neither nice nor gentle.

“…I’m tired…”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t even know that, and it was no different than me grabbing you and bothering you… I’m really sorry, sister.”

So could she let me go? I smiled bitterly while holding on to my mask. I was about to go back to my room, saying goodbye, but Ersia was confused and followed me. Oh, get off! I pretended not to notice the humming sound inside me, but Ersia still followed me. I eventually glanced around at my sister who had followed me to the front of my room and was bothering me.

“What’s wrong? What do you have to say?”

Now that it’s a mask, I didn’t have the strength to use it, so I asked with a cold, hard face. No, maybe it was because I thought that there was no need to wear a mask because I wanted to anger others at least. Ersia hated it, put her hands together and placed them on her chest, then looked at me with her earnest eyes.

“Sister, I have a favor.”

“What?”

“A little here…”

I let out a sigh when I saw Ersia lowering her voice while looking around her. Others described Ersia’s appearance as a delicate dandelion. Or it was said that she was like a sunflower following me around. Around this time, I was a gloomy older sister, and Ersia was weak, delicate, and sickly, but she was a good child who did not show off and reached out to people first. She was the opposite of me. She was a child who used the existence of me, who had been expelled from society, as a windbreak and gave a false smile. Swallowing my nausea, I reached out and opened the door and entered the room.

“Come in.”

As soon as I entered the very dark room because the blackout curtain was down, I sat on a chair and looked at Ersia.

Ersia closed the door and came inside and looked at me.

“Yes, I have a request for you.”

“Sister, bad rumors are circulating these days.”

“What rumors?”

“I… There are rumors that I may get engaged or married soon.”

It’s a rumor I created. However, I tilted my head because I could not answer.

“So? How did that rumor come about?”

“I don’t know either. I didn’t do anything…”

“I don’t know either. But don’t worry too much. Do you think the rumors will become reality?”

“…Is that right?”

“Of course. Don’t worry too much. It’s not good for your body.”

“Sister…”

I looked at the two eyes that were looking at me with a moving expression. That’s probably not the purpose, but I lifted my chin slightly.

“So what’s your request?”

“Oh.”

Ercia seemed to have forgotten a little, and smiled briskly as she approached me.

“Sister, the man you meet, introduce him to me too.”

“Who?”

“Your Excellency the Grand Duke of Verdian…

“…”

I felt like I was about to burst into laughter. The first thing I thought was the same. She was a child who did not know how to give up. My head was throbbing. The voice of the younger sister who suddenly came and talked nonsense ran through my veins and seemed to inflict an internal blow. My heart was beating fast.

“There are strange rumors going around these days… I’m so anxious. So I want to get help from him.”

“What help.”

My voice subsided. How was my expression? Were the corners of my mouth down, or were they wildly drawn horizontally? What about the eyes? When one bothered me, two or three bothered me.

“Hmmm… For example, dating advice… maybe?”

It wouldn’t be a simple consultation. It must be a temptation with skinship disguised as dating counseling and all sorts of things.

“…You don’t know what kind of relationship I have with Ian, right?”

“Oh, sister, I’m not having vain thoughts about the Grand Duke of Berdian.”

No? She was good at telling obvious lies. I closed my eyes tightly. Starting with my grandfather’s work, the plans floating around in my head, and the future events that were about to happen, tormented me. I wanted to beat them all up, but I couldn’t give up. If I let go of my hand like this, it was like drawing a picture they wanted again. It can’t be like that. First of all, I thought that I should definitely have the closest one. Her mind, which had been sluggish and unable to make a decision, was uttered with confidence thanks to Ersia.

“I think I’ll get married.”

Seeing Ersia’s expression hardened in an instant, joy rose from beneath me, and I smiled softly. Yeah, that’s how it feels. I pulled the corners of my lips hard.

Contrary to my expression, Elsia’s expression came into view clearly in the atmosphere that had become cold to laugh very happily. Thinking about it, my twin sister lifted her finger slightly and lifted the chin. I gazed loftily down at my sister and slightly rolled my eyes to examine her hand. She was gripped tightly. What didn’t intercept my sister’s?

My marriage to Ian, in fact, did not need to be rushed. After getting rid of Ersia, I planned to establish a stable shield through my slow union with him. By the time the season passed and the autumn wind blew, my heart was always heavy because it was my grandfather’s anniversary. Always on the day my grandfather passed away, I would go to the grave in Forral Hill and place the apple pie she loved on the headstone. At that time, I killed my heart, thinking that it was inevitable, but now it was a future that could be changed.  Just as meeting Beralt changed the events that led to my engagement, my coming-of-age ceremony, and my relationship with Ersia, I firmly believed that she could change my grandfather’s future. However, Ersia’s behavior was enough to make me make a hasty decision while I was paying attention to everything, not knowing when, where, or in what way the incident might happen.

I couldn’t miss Ian. It wasn’t because I loved him or because she had a crush on him. Of course, Ian was a man who would benefit from having him close to me even if he wasn’t my partner, and had nothing to lose. Besides, he was quite a nuisance when turned into an enemy. But even if I put aside such rational thoughts, I felt sick to my stomach for some reason when I thought of Ersia smiling next to  Ian. She was simply robbed of mine, and I was angry enough to think it was because of her loss, so I wondered if it was jealousy, but I tried to deny it. Anyway, there is one thing that Ercia’s bullshit convinced me. I’m going to make him mine.

“Really, sister?”

“Oh, really.”

“But the engagement ceremony…”

“You don’t have to have an engagement ceremony to get married. People already know that we’re seeing each other. He was my partner at my coming-of-age ceremony, and it’s already been published in various newspapers that the two of us are in a relationship.”

Rumors that had been circulating only in the aristocratic community began to spread to the public, drawing people’s attention. The sight of Ian and I going up and down the carriage together has already been featured in the newspaper more than ten times. The public was already establishing a relationship between the two of us because we were the subject of a hot topic enough to capture us by using the few shooting tools available in newspapers. Usually, marriage between aristocratic families was said to be for money. It was common for lesser families to sell their daughters for a dowry. Because of that, marriage between nobles was not a word that gave a very good impression to the common people. But the rumors circulating between me and Ian were quite positive. First of all, the composition was relatively opposite. Ajstain, who has tremendous financial power, and the Berdian family, who will defend the country based on that financial power. It was enough to be praised as the best combination. It must have also played a role in improving his impression through the welfare project conducted by the Ajstain family.