Cover The Sky With One Hand, Beat The Ground With The Other

I spent two days in the inn with tears

Of course, you will rest when you are tired of crying, eat when you are hungry, and sleep when you are full. The so-called time to wash one's face with tears is outside of normal work and rest.

However, this does not mean that I'm not sad enough. As a matter of fact, I was so distraught that night, I couldn't accept the situation and move on. I opened and closed the door, took off my belt and hung myself from the beam. 

Then the beam collapsed.

After that, even though I tried hard to blame the material the beam was made of, the shopkeeper still made me pay three taels of silver. He obviously thought that I was too heavy.

I was heartbroken, so I just broke the jar and spent a lot of money on food.

After all, if I'm going to die, I'm going to be a ghost that has a full stomach.

I know that although this inn is not very solid, but the cuisine is excellent, that I forgot to die while I was eating. By the time I remembered, I had roughly passed the period of despair, and my sanity gradually returned to normal.

I couldn't help but reflect on myself why I always commit suicide on impulse. Although I can't remember why I jumped off the cliff a year ago, silently hanging inside an inn is definitely a stupid act.

Some deaths tend to be heavier than Mount Tai. A death that is too low-profile has no meaning in life at all.

I'm thinking about a spectacular sacrifice. For example, being hanged at the wedding banquet hosted by the Nie and Zhao families.

When I thought of this, I started crying all over again.

I missed Xu Fang so much and thought about how I would die for him, but he's marrying another woman.

A year ago their wedding had an accident, and a year later they renewed their marriage. He may not care about the one-year gap, but for me, it's full of memories.

I don't think I can sit back and wait to die. I should muster up the courage to go to kidnap the bride. It is true that I will not be killed if I sit in an inn. But if I go and kidnap the bride, I will probably be able to fulfill my long-cherished wish to die a heroic death.

First of all, I have no wedding invitation, there is no way to go in fair and square, I also don't know any martial arts, I have no ability to break in without hindrance, and finally, the wall of Nie Mansion is really a little too high. If I climb up with a ladder, I still need to jump down. That's like dying even before I left the master. (*means to die even before setting out to fight the enemy)

After thinking about it, I gave up the idea since it was too radical, and thought it would be safer to ask Xu Fang out instead and have a good talk.

How to ask him out is another big problem. If there is plenty of time, I may have considered methods such as pestering and beating or stalking him all day, but it's a pity that they will be getting married the day after tomorrow.

I wrote two letters.

I took advantage of Zhao Yanran's cloth shopping to tempt a passerby with with candied haws to hand one of the letters to her.

Typically, Zhao Yanran would then ask after reading the letter, "Little brother, who gave this to you?" The child will immediately shook his head and said he didn't know and then ran away. Who would have known, she just looked at the envelope, blushed and gave the little brother an ingot of silver, which really made me feel very frightened.

Fortunately, after she opened the letter, her expression changed greatly, then she looked around in horror, and finally ran away hurriedly while holding her skirt.

This is the reaction of normal people.

I came out of the corner with my baggage on my back and wandered slowly along the street twice. When I got to the gate of Nie Mansion, I handed another letter to the guard and slipped the silver I had snatched from my little brother to him, and just went to the appointment with satisfaction.

The location of the date is the bamboo forest on the outskirts of the city. The date is with Zhao Yanran.

I didn't ask her out because I was abandoned by Xu Fang and I wanted to move on. Even if I really wanted to, I wouldn't have moved on to her, although I have to admit that she's a great beauty.

The beauty now stands alone in the bamboo forest, and her delicate and gentle body is shaken by the wind and appears to be frail. I quietly approached her and said kindly: "Miss Zhao wears so little, so be careful not to catch cold."

Seeing that it was me, Zhao Yanran took two steps back: "You…...What took you so long?"

She's probably annoyed that I was not punctual enough, and I said apologetically, "I was delayed on the way. Miss Zhao has indeed been waiting for a long time."

She began to look around hurriedly again, until she confirmed that there were only two of us at the scene, took out the letter I gave her from her sleeve and asked with gritted teeth: "Why did you write this letter in Brother Ran's handwriting?"

I was stunned, no wonder she looked like that when she first saw the letter. She thought it was a love letter from her brother Ran. "I was close to him, so why should it be surprising if I can write the way he does?"

Zhao Yanran stared at me furiously, "Even if you say so, he still won't believe you."

"Now that Miss Zhao is here, she's worried that the paper can't contain the fire." (*eventually will be exposed and cannot be hidden) I said indifferently: "If you're not afraid, then why should we talk about it here?"

She hesitated for a moment, took out a stack of silver notes from inside her coat and stuffed them to me: "One thousand two hundred taels, no less, where are the items?"

I was speechless for a moment, and I couldn't help feeling whether this young lady was too simple, and didn't even understand the principle of "Take it or leave it". I took off my baggage, glanced behind her and asked cautiously, "I don't know how Miss Zhao's kung fu is?"

Zhao Yanran slowly turned back along the direction of my eyes and said with some fear, "I, I don't know kung fu, what's wrong?"

I breathed a sigh of relief and calmly took out the hemp rope in the bag: "That's good."

Zhao Yanran stared at the hemp rope and stammered: "What, what are you going to do?"

I said, "Don't worry, I don't know kung fu either."

She also breathed a sigh of relief.

I just didn't finish my words: "But with a lot of strength, I should be able to beat you."

Zhao Yanran: "…..."

After I tied her tightly, she finally got tired of scolding: "If I lose a single hair, my Brother Ran will never let you go."

I leaned down, stretched out my hand and plucked out one of her hair. "Why don't you show this hair to your Brother Ran and make him feel distressed?"

She had never seen a kidnapper like me before, so she choked for a long time. The delicate appearance looked really pitiful. I sighed, "I won't hurt you, but I want to talk to him face to face about something." After a pause, "In fact, you know me, right? You should also know that he is.....why forgot me."

She turned her head silently, and didn't answer, as if she were sad. I think I can guess why she was sad, but I really didn't want to think about it.

When Xu Fang came, it was the time when the moon sank. When he saw us, his dark eyes filled with anger: "Who are you?!"

It took me a long time to realize that he was talking to me. Just now, because Zhao Yanran was making noises, she was gagged with a hand cloth. Now it really looked like she is indeed being held hostage. I simply exposed the dagger in my sleeve and put it next to her neck: "If you come one step closer, don't blame the knife for being blind."

He looked at me coldly and finally took a step back: "What's your purpose?"

No purpose, I just want to have a good talk with you, Xu Fang.

I didn't say that, but threw the letter to Zhao Yanran at him: "Do you know why she came?

Because I told her that I had evidence of your life in Chen Village in the past year, and a notice that the Marquis of Xiayang was looking for you that day. I used these to exchange 1200 silvers with her"

I threw the silver in front of him. "Look, she actually gave it."

Xu Fang read the letter and notice with a frown: "You ..."

"My purpose is to tell you the truth, although I don't know why you forgot overnight what happened this year, But I....I don't want you to marry her in such a muddleheaded way before you know the truth. "

Zhao Yanran helplessly wanted to shake her head, but also for fear of being hurt by the dagger, she can only  open her tearful eyes amidst her aggrieved sobs.

After a long time, Xu Fang put down the letter, his voice could not hear the emotion: "What is the girl trying to tell me? To tell me that this year has turned into another person? But what does this have to do with my wanting to marry her?"

I said in disbelief, "Aren't you, aren't you curious about what happened in the past year? How do you know after all that, you still......Would you still like to marry her?"

Under the hazy moonlight, Xu Fang looked at me for an instant: "Could it be that you are saying that I had a change of heart this year?"

My heart tightened.

He said, "I had already made a promise with Yanran, if it is true as you said, wouldn't that make me a heartless man? Since God told me to forget this memory, why should I persist in remembering it? I'm not going to give up on her, so I should treat her with all my heart, isn't that right?"

Isn't it?

I saw Zhao Yanran burst into tears.

It turns out that from the beginning it was me who was wrong. When they were forced apart, I took advantage of the situation. Now, they are about to be married, and I'm the one who stirred up the trouble.

I clenched my lips tightly to restrain myself from crying. Xu Fang stared at my hand with the dagger: "Why don't you let her go?"

I didn't let go, I'm still......not willing. But what can I do?

That day, Xu Fang instructed me not to leave in disgrace. Now, what else can I do but leave?

I didn't even get to say goodbye to him properly.

I took the jade flute off my waist and looked at him: "Can you play a piece of music for me?"

He said coldly, "What other tricks do you want to play?"

I threw the jade flute at his feet and said, "That song is called 'The Wind and Moon'. When you finish playing, I will release Miss Zhao."

"I've never heard of that song." he said.

Yes, 'The Wind and Moon', this is a piece of music written by Xu Fang for He Feng. He has forgotten Xu Fang. How can he remember it?

He once said that if he changed his mind, He will let me hit him hard on the head using the jade flute.

But after all, I was reluctant to do this, only said: "Then I'll sing and you play, all right?"

He didn't refuse. In order to protect his beauty, how will he dare refuse?

In the bamboo forest in the moonlight, a woman hummed softly, and a man played flute in the forest. What a beautiful scene, just like the days when He Feng and Xu Fang were still in the countryside.

The tune he played, the way he blew, his calm and quiet posture, he is my favorite Xu Fang.

But it's all fake. I've robbed them.

Suddenly, I couldn't sing anymore, and the sound of the flute stopped abruptly. Xu Fang maintained the posture of holding up the flute, and the dull expression suddenly moved: "Is the girl......in love with me?"

I was dumbfounded.

He stared at me steadily, with a look I vaguely knew between his brows: "You fell in love with me in the past year?"

I shuddered: "Do you, do you remember something?"

Just as I took half a step to get closer to him, a black shadow swept by with the wind in front of me, and I received a solid slap on my shoulder, and in a flash, I heard some shattering sound. Xu Fang was already holding Zhao Yanran a few steps away from me.

The grass was swaying in the wind, and I sat down in it, covering my heart confusedly. I couldn't help wondering why, when the palm clearly hit me on the shoulder, it was so painful here.

After Xu Fang untied the restraints on Zhao Yanran's body and confirmed that she's not hurt, he just said to me: "Do you know what crime it is to kidnap the Prime Minister's daughter?"

I didn't answer. It doesn't matter what the crime is.

After a long time, he said, "You can go."

Zhao Yanran was surprised.

Zhao Yanran spoke up, "Brother Ran, how can you just let her go?"

He did not answer her, and said to me again, "You can go."

I still couldn't go.

The next moment, there are white lights in front of me.

For a moment, I was stunned. I don't know when, but many men in black suddenly appeared, and their target was Xu Fang. The group of black-clothed men were well-trained, and their long and narrow swords were freely deployed. Even though Xu Fang has good skills, he had to be distracted from protecting Zhao Yanran while attacking, so he's naturally at a disadvantage.

Perhaps because they saw Xu Fang hit me earlier, they thought Zhao Yanran was more of a threat, so they ignored me sitting on the ground and forced her to move. If I had taken the opportunity to escape at this point, most likely no one would have been distracted enough to catch up with me.

Unfortunately, I made a fool of myself again.

When one of the men in black with hideous eyebrows and scars pointed the tip of his arrow's fletching at Xu Fang, I subconsciously jumped to block it. Then......I managed to block it.

The usual plot development at a time like this is for me to go limp on his back and for him to turn around and hold me in shock

"Why did you do that......"

"Because I like you......"

"You, why are you bothering to do this ......"

"Don't feel guilty and grow old together with Miss Zhao in the future......"

"No! He Feng! I remember everything, don't go......"

And then I died perfectly in his arms.

However, plays are not like real life, and real life is not as good as plays.

Just when I felt my back was pierced by the arrow's sharp point, Xu Fang swept himself desperately, holding Zhao Yanran in his arms and hastily avoided the shadow of the sword.

He didn't even notice that I had blocked an arrow for him, and he's satisfied as he thought about Zhao Yanran.

I don't know if the arrow truly pierced a hole in my back, but when the sharp pain started spreading all over my body, that bodily pain is far less than the pain in my heart.

It's a pity that I didn't die at that moment.

The man in black couldn't believe that there are still fools like me who will block arrows for people in this world, and the point is that after blocking, I was also ignored by that person. He probably also felt that I am unloved, living like I did, so he waved his knife at me to end my life. But he was stopped by Xu Fang with a sound.

He didn't know that I was shot by an arrow: "Go!"

I have long been speechless in pain, Zhao Yanran is also scared and her legs have gone soft, so how can we even walk away?

The black-clad men surged up like a rising tide, and Xu Fang chopped and slashed, "Go!"

I saw his anxious look. I don't know where the strength came from. I wiped the blood from the corners of my mouth, struggled to prop up my body, and dragged Zhao Yanran and ran towards the direction of the cliff.

I think I'm really crazy, can't even save myself but still care about her, but I don't think it's too crazy, at least I can still remember that under the cliff is a river, maybe I can find another piece of life.

The pain in my back was spreading rapidly, and I kept on moving.

I don't know if I will die of exhaustion in the next moment, but suddenly I heard Zhao Yanran's voice as thin as silk asked: "Why......did you block this arrow for him?"

Her lips were white and pale: "He clearly does not remember you."

I turned my head away and climbed all the way to the edge of the cliff. Looking back, Xu Fang is also retreating towards this area, step by step. I whispered to Zhao Yanran: "He will remember me one day. If I just think about it this way, I will feel very happy. " A lump formed in my throat, "Jump down, he's a good swimmer and will save you."

The moment I fell off the cliff, I heard Xu Fang calling out Zhao Yanran's name.

I closed my eyes and prayed to God that this would be the end.

I don't know how long I floated in the cold water, I heard a familiar voice: "Hold on!"

Doubting that I had auditory hallucinations, I struggled to look up and open my eyes, only to see Xu Fang.

I was so overjoyed that I thought it was worth dying at this time, but I saw Zhao Yanran clasping him in his arms.

Hold on tight. Not to me, but to Zhao Yanran.

He added: "Don't be afraid, I will be with you, Yanran."

Don't worry, I'll be with you, He Feng.

The exact same voice, the exact same words, lingering in the ear, lingering in the heart.

Zhao Yanran tightly grabbed my sleeve and said to Xu Fang, "She, she was hit by an arrow......"

"Oh?" Xu Fang then turned to look at me, his dark eyes cold, "The girl knows that her life is in danger, then still thought of pulling Yanran to accompany your funeral? You are really a snake with a scorpion's heart!"

Snake with a scorpion's heart? Xu Fang he......what he's talking about.

The body suddenly felt the impact of the surging waves of the river. Xu Fang clung to the rock wall and shouted to Zhao Yanran with great difficulty: "The current is too strong——if you don't let her go, we will die."

Zhao Yanran almost could not hold on to me anymore: "But Brother, we can't let her die......"

With a sudden tightening of the wrist, Xu Fang grabbed me at a critical moment. He looked cruel: "I'm saving you for Yan Ran's sake."

The shadows of the mountains were scattered, and the eyes were hazy with water fog. I guess if he saw it, he would think it was gratitude.

Up to now, I finally know why the heavens has not let me die for a long time. It is to make me see clearly and shatter my dream thoroughly.

The irrepressible loss of life, inch by inch. The past is like a tossing and turning of a moving lamp, constantly flickering.

I feel like a dead fish, caught tightly by the hook, trying to keep my head up, trying to keep my eyes open, but no matter how hard I tried, the two shadows can't be overlapped together. 

I slowly freed up a hand, but did not reach out to him. Instead, I turned to my back and grasped the arrow shaft. The blood slipped down my fingers as I held it more and more tightly, and suddenly pulled it out with all my strength. It came out. Maybe it was because the action was too big, or maybe it left a bloodstain, Xu Fang froze: "You——"

After all, I didn't dare to tell him that the arrow was blocked for him. I was afraid that he would ridicule me as a woman who is as poisonous as a snake and scorpion. Such a remark would be enough to make me go up in smoke.

The tears that came out of my eyes blurred my vision, and Zhao Yanran's voice came with the wind. I couldn't hear a word of it. In fact, I was afraid of dying, although I was often capricious and disregarded death. That was only because I thought Xu Fang would always be there for me.

I heard myself whisper, "Young Master Nie, just now you asked me if I was in love with you. Now, I'll tell you."

"No."

"The person I like is Xu Fang."

The moment the tip of the arrow plunged into his arm that grabbed me,  it coincided with the huge waves. What was heavy in my heart seemed to have vanished in a flash.

Killing myself this time, I don't think I'll mess it up again.