Episode 21 – The Lonely Farewell Ceremony

Some time has passed since then, and today’s committee meeting was adjourned.

The discussion this time was limited to a light assignment of roles. As this is a new project, they are not going to skip it from the beginning. At any rate, the role I managed to get was ……

(patrolling the school building after school……or something like that)

There were various other roles, such as a campaign to call for morning greetings, or to take care of the school equipment, but I chose the one that would allow me to slack off the most. This was the one where I would not be monitored or instructed by anyone, including teachers or students.

“……”

I had to admit that the fact that my step sister was staring at me with a puzzled look was seared into my mind. What does she think I am, anyway?

When I was about to leave the classroom with my luggage to go home, someone called out to me.

“Um, may I have a moment?”

“….”

I quietly turned around and stared back at the person, avoiding face to face contact as much as possible. Damn, this was unexpected.

“Um, Shiina san, right?”

“…..Right, what is it?”

I replied to Sakura, trying to be as natural as possible. I haven’t dared to change my voice because I’ve been through voice changes. I thought she would be more comfortable talking to me.

Perhaps because of that result, Sakura never looks at me strangely. Then why did she talk to me?

“Excuse me, I wanted to talk to you privately. I didn’t know Haruka senpai’s younger brother was in the same grade.”

“Oh, I see.”

I see. It seems that she didn’t look at me, Tachibana Kanata.

Even so, my step sister is quite talkative, so it wouldn’t be strange for her to bring me up as a topic. What’s more, it became an opportunity for her younger step brother to get involved. Certainly, it’s not surprising that my step sister, who is taking good care of me, would be talking about me to this person.

“I’m looking forward to working with you from now on. I’m expecting great things from you !”

“Well, in moderation.”

Saying that, Sakura turned on her heel toward Takanashi sensei. Although I was a little nervous, she probably hasn’t found out about me yet.

If she knows about me and is still hiding her feelings, that’s impressive. But she has no such skills, and I didn’t teach her such advanced skills. At least she had feelings of expectation and friendship for me. If that’s the case, it’s still okay.

(For now, let’s hurry home for today.)

Fortunately, the activity starts tomorrow, and I don’t have to do it every day, just once or twice a week. If I don’t do anything unnecessary, I won’t have to get involved with her. And that’s the real goodbye.

（Sorry, Sakura.)

I don’t want to get involved with you anymore…….

※

An hour after I came home, my step sister came home. Her expression was exhausted and it was clear that she had been through hard work. Then, as soon as she got home, she said something to me.

“You didn’t talk to Sakura about something trivial, did you?”

Apparently, she had seen me talking with Sakura. She seemed to be worried, but I never talked about her behind her back. 

“She just told me she was looking forward to working with me.”

“Yes, that’s right. Then you should live up to her expectations.”

“Well, in moderation I said.”

“……As a man, don’t you think you should show a little coolness?”

My step sister said so and went upstairs to the stairs in dismay. 

(……As a man, huh)

I’m not particular about it, but I don’t like the way she said it. I’m not an equalist, but I do think that by creating such a frame, a fixed concept is created, and that leads to inequality. Simply put, it’s a pain to make assumptions.

If I were to give an example, it would be me and Sakura. I’m a man, but I have the flexibility to bend my body as much as a female ballerina, and Sakura, who was athletically inept at first, has survived an attack by a drunken thug with her bare hands. Both of these are acquired skills that we acquired through hard work, not innate talents.

(Is it possible that my step sister’s thought process is old-fashioned?)

Come to think of it, I didn’t know my step sister before I came to this house. She went to a different middle school, and we had only been together for about a year.

I wonder where she was born and how she grew up before she met me. Even if I asked her, she wouldn’t answer me.

(Well, I don’t really need to know.)

It’s not like we’re particularly close, and it’s not information I need to know in the first place. Well, I don’t plan to harm her in any strange way while we’re still family.

And, I remembered what you said earlier about getting hurt.

(Sakura, didn’t you continue what I taught you?)

Maybe she doesn’t want to use the techniques taught by a man she doesn’t like. It’s possible that her soul unconsciously refuses to use the techniques, blocking her growth. If that’s the case, the old Sakura are much more threatening.

The current Sakura may be easier to conquer than I think.

I know it’s not good to be so sure, but somehow I can’t help feeling that way. It’s like she could collapse at the drop of a hat if there is any trigger…..

(Phew, that’s exactly me.)

Making the wrong choice. I learned firsthand how serious and cruel that can be.

Helping others is an extremely unrewarding role. In that sense, maybe the first mistake I made in my life was to let my grandma spark my sense of righteousness.

(My dad would also teach me such and such things.)

It gave me the power to help others. Trusting him too much was the second mistake I made in my life.

Grandma shaped my mind, and my father trained me in various skills. That gave birth to the mistake, and that is me.

(Sakura…..no, Shinkai. I’ll still forgive you if you don’t do anything unnecessary to me.)

How much I was tormented by the words of that person in the past. I still can’t get her words and face out of my mind. I don’t hold a grudge against her, and there was no need to force her into a corner.

However, in the unlikely event that she ever found out about me, I might be in a situation where there was nothing I could do. That possibility always exists when I spend time in the same school organization. There is nothing I can do about it.

It would be nice if I could insulate myself from her as I did with Kisaragi, but with her, that would be extremely difficult. However, if there is even the slightest possibility of doing so, I will definitely take that chance, and I will make even the slightest possibility a certainty.

(If the need arises).

I will take advantage of everything I can, even the trauma that the other students and that girl are going through.

The half-hearted Tachibana Kanata is already dead. Then there’s no need to worry about him anymore.

For me, Shinkai Sakura is already a stranger.